Things have been awesome. I just heard this song before I took a break for a second, so you can enjoy it too:
#grownassman
So after hashing #grownassman, I decided to follow it. What I found was most totally ghetto posts, but then I saw something distinctly different, so I read it. I liked it, so here it is:
Note that while a grown ass man says what he feels, etc., it may be necessary for him to be cool and just have fun. Basically, he’s not going to worry about the relationship, since that will take care of itself. No, his job is to have fun and be happy. This means “Don’t think too much or at least keep your mouth shut and don’t be a drama queen.”
As Cindy Lauper best said, girls just want to have fun.
Kinda Mad
New Friend, New Purpose
I went to a big social event on Friday with a friend. I thought it would be good for him to meet some new people.
It turns out it wasn’t his kind of event. He doesn’t like dancing and isn’t very outgoing, so he doesn’t really enjoy places where he doesn’t know people.
After touring the castle, he said he was bored.
Then we left. If It was my choice, I would’ve stayed and dance. Those kinds of events are the events at which I tend to start the dance party.
At pretty much any 20s & 30s event with music, I start the dance party. I just dance with one person for a half a song. Eventually another. Sooner or later, someone else joins in. Before you know it, lots of people are dancing or watching. Events I recall are:
- Client’s Christmas party
- Any Deloitte Busy Season HH back on the day
- Social Science (this is the one that ended with 4 couples dancing with crowds in a circle around and crowds on the floor above, all of which erupted in applause when the DJ stopped the music, much like in the resort club in Jamaica with Jae and Danielle)
- I’m sure others, too
Maybe I’m always just the first, but I do have a history of starting some trends.
Anyways, I decided I’m not going to bring that friend to big social events anymore. I actually bought his ticket for that event, too. He’s kind of a downer sometimes.
I was talking with Al tonight. Al is an awesome body builder at my gym who is a wise old man about some things. He is old. In his 60s, I think. Okay, so retired-body builder He’s given me tips on how to increase my definition that have worked. But about this, he just said it wouldn’t make sense to hang out with someone who doesn’t let me be myself. And it doesn’t.
So I’m not going to hang out with that friend at large social events anymore. I can usually find or make friends if I go solo. But I’d much prefer to go with a friend.
Anniversary
Presence.
When I am with people, I have of mind, usually totally. This is a good thing sometimes, and it’s bad sometimes too.
It’s good because I can focus on solving a problem. It’s food because I do don’t just process what is needed, but I make sure it looks good in my mind. For instance, I found a slight discrepancy even filing the Sales tax return for April. For one item, there were Minneapolis sales that were not in Hennepin County.
Kind of odd of you think about it.
Apparently I found an error in the computer process that’s been going on since 2005.
I notice things because when I’m working on something, I’m not thinking about what I’m doing after work; I’m thinking about all the attributes of the work and making sure they all agree.
Presence can be good, but it can also be bad. Then I go on a first date, I always have an attention distraction. That way, I don’t focus on the lady with whom I am.
It can also be bad because it can make me oblivious. For instance, I was just at a big party with my friend, and I totally didn’t notice my other friend until he pointed her out to me.
One would think that I would keep my eyes open, but I can easily get lost in what I’m doing. I like people, and everything turns out well in the end, which makes me seemingly not care. I care, but certain things in life are beyond my control. Other people are so complex that I don’t try to have any control over them. I just let life do the steering.
I’ve learned from my own experience. Someone once tried to make a play, and I think my response was unexpected. Therefore, I don’t try to control someone.
On that note, I do try to influence things, of course. If I haven’t talked to someone for a long time and would like to, I might send them a note.
I believe in the natural order of things. Life will let me meet the right friends at the right time. Long past are my days of trying – I’m just myself, and that gives others a fair choice. That was my flaw in the past: I tried, and I had an undefined self.
I love who I am.
Justin
Geographical Maturity and Trends – Uptown
People who even vaguely know me know that I make a lot of social events in Uptown. Weekdays, weekends. After work to late night. I’ve noticed things that are useful for event planners:
In general, there is an area of Uptown that mostly caters to the post-college “going out” kind of person. This is officially Uptown, according to Google Maps. There is another area of Uptown that caters to those in the early-career stage “going out”. This is Lynne-Lake.
In Uptown, you have popular bars such as the Uptown Tavern, Bar Louie, Calhoun Square, etc. In general, you also have a ton of shopping, and it’s more “trendy”. It easily attracts a younger crowd, as they don’t have their own style yet, so “popular” is best for them. Uptown is busier, too. It appeals to the masses. And that’s great sometimes. Comedy Sportz caters to the younger crowd, as it is short-form improv, meaning it requires less attention span and tends to include more physical humor.
Some of the best attractions in trendy Uptown are Bar Louie, Calhoun Square, and other popular bars. While it is a little between, Coup d’Etait is in Uptown.
Some different Uptown locations give a style a little different than most of Uptown. For instance, Famous Dave’s does not typically cater towards a young crowd. It’s one of the few places in the Cities that consistently has good jazz and a dance floor. There are dance lessons and dancing tends to be more organized than just club dancing. I secretly want to tell everyone my age who dances at a club to learn how to dance.
Obviously, nicer restaurants don’t cater towards the young crowd. I still need to explore Uptown south and west of Calhoun Square. That is on my summer itinerary.
Lynne-Lake is awesome, as it caters mostly to my age group.
My three favorite places are obviously HUGE Theater, Louie’s Wine Dive, and HUGE Theater. I just know a lot of people, so my opinion may be a little slanted.
HUGE Theater has “long form improv”, meaning instead of “Whose Line Is It Anyways”-like skits that last 10 minutes, they have one, 45 minute skit. The players are more intellectually engaging, and the shows are very entertaining. The disadvantage is that sometimes if I walk in late, I have no idea what’s going on, adn I usually have to wait until the next show to have a good idea.
The Bryant Lake Bowl is another area that is split. The bowling part obviously caters towards the young crowd, but they also have theatre.
Lynne-Lake generally has less parking than Uptown, but it’s pretty much always free.
The Herkimer is also a nice Lynne-Lake place. It fulfills the general “bar” needs without specialties like wine or bikers (there’s a biker bar right on Lyndale and Lake St.
Much like with everything in life, a good mix between Uptown and Lynne Lake is best. Each one offers its own uniquities.
Trifecta.
I encourage everyone to keep their standards high. Never settle! At least when it comes to a long-term relationship
Most people know I have standards, and it’s true. I’m basically holding out my long-term commitment (my heart) until I find the right girl.
I mean, don’t get me wrong, I’ll have some short-term fun no problem. But even then I have my standards that makes it challenging to find someone.
What are those standards? Good question. I put a little thought into it. Basically, I want to find the trifecta of sexy for the long-term. Just the first and third for the short-term.
By short term, of course, I mean hanging out or whatever with no assumption of long-term. It may turn into long-term, but it takes a little long longer because we have to know each other really well.
One is simply personality. The personality needs to jive with mine. That’s a gimmie for anyone, but I’ll add more details. I mean, yes, she has to be happy and enthusiastic, obviously. Some uniquities I enjoy are less common. For one, she’s got to be fun. I should be able to poke fun, and she needs to return it. Talking to her has to be fun, too. See the next section.
However, having a personality that “jives” with mine does not mean that she’ll go along with everything. There’s got to be some give and take.
Frankly, I love when a woman can put me in my place. Because if I’m dating you, I’ll listen to you. We don’t need a long dramatic convo, but just tell me to knock it the hell out. Now I may not have always been able to follow such instructions, but I can control myself nowadays.
Along with putting me in my place, I love it when a woman is herself and is fairly stubborn. I work with someone at my job who checks me into her preferences when I get out of hand, and I’m secretly attracted to her. Not in a big way, but I find it pretty hot. We have an interesting professional relationship (no, not my colleague).
But stubbornness is hot, at least to a point. Once it starts encroaching on my life, it’s not. Basically, the little “corrections” should be mostly out of jest, but she’s probably right, so I give in nearly immediately.
The second in the trifecta is intellect. This one is solely the biggest one. If a lady has the brains, we laugh more and get each other better. Rarely will minds be on the same wavelength before being married for 30 years, but I can only imagine how awesome that would be. This second one makes the first one go from personalities jiving to personalities doing a whole 10 dance (for my non-dance readers, a 10 dance refers to all 10 international ballroom dances, including the jive).
Three is simple. The third part is simply attraction. Yes. The third part of the trifecta of sexy is…. well, sexiness. Physical attraction combined with the right characteristics to make my mind wonder about her.She should be active. She should have awesome eyes. That’s important for me. Naturally, eyes like mine are the coolest, because they’re not common, but also because I’m a total narcissist.
Rarely do all these things come together.
The trifecta of sexy is not common, so I’m just waiting until I find it again. I’ve found it twice. Once when I was younger, and once when I was older.
One time I found it, but she had the second attribute very strongly. My brain is odd because it simply doesn’t forget intellectual information. So this woman was sexy and absolutely stimulated my mind like no one else. Not forgetting, my mind held on for a long time. I shouldn’t have, but it was a long time ago and after a coule years, I let go.
If I had to do it again, I would focus on the primal side of attraction, and not the intellectual side so I wouldn’t be stuck on her for so long. It was weird. Intellectually compatible like no one else, after only a month, I thought I was in love (because she was stuck in my head, and because it was summer and I didn’t have enough to do). Now I’m focusing on the short-term. If I ever find a woman who has the trifecta again, I’ll no doubt just enjoy it whilst I keep my mind on the short term.
This is a song about dating:
Appreciation
I know I should go to sleep since I have a very big day tomorrow, but instead I’m just sitting on my porch coach just listening to the rain.
It makes me think about how lucky I am:
For one, I have a house that is mine that has a porch on which to listen to the rain. I’ve always made great financial decisions, but I’d be lying if I didn’t say it was mostly luck – buying a house at the bottom of the real estate market, crazy luck investing, even during the recession, and just a lot of random good things. I always say, consistent luck is a skill 😉 .
I’m incredibly lucky to have found my corporate job. Okay, so all I wanted was a corporate tax job that would allow me to have a ton of freedom and would embrace my own firm. I absolutely found it! I work a lot because I’m incredibly busy at my job and at my business, but it’s okay. Seriously, u thought my job wouldn’t exist until it did.
My job has given me some financial stability and stability to my days – the latter one is most important. Rather than driving all over the cities at all times of the day, I know where I’m going to be for most days.
My business has dramatically changed. After hiring my colleague, it’s now my job to get enough work so she’s busy. I’d most prefer to keep her busy because she is an awesome person, a great fit for my business and my crazy personality, and also because she makes my business much stronger. That might be a business blog posting, though.
I just love life. I was caught up in what or who I wanted until about November, but I’ve remembered that life is wonderful no matter what!
This is a funny song, but it is irrelevant to the post.
No matter what happens to jobs, there’re jobs everywhere. For girls, while they’re not common, there are several spunky hotty nerds (I.e. smaties) out there (that’s one of my types). Also, I definitely don’t need a girl.
Lawn Boxing
An easy solution for a common problem for homeowners is not known by everyone.
I’ll illustrate with a very simple drawing made on my Photography Advanced Image Necessity Tool program (PAINT).
Here is a house and lawn:
Obviously, it’s a Saint Paul house because of the detached garage.
I know not everyone knows about this because I see messes all over.
Many people mow in straight lines, which makes sense. But this causes our problem:
The problem is when a lawn mower crosses the sidewalk from one area of lawn to the other, it leaves a big clump of grass clippings. Generally, that will wash away with heavy rain, but not always, and it doesn’t always rain. Many homeowners pick it up themselves.
The solution is simple. By simply not crossing from one lawn to the other, the clipping messes will be avoided. Of course, it’s still a pain to turn the lawn mower 180 degrees more often, plus such a rotation will often leave clumps of grass clippings anyways.
When using this solution, in those rare moments you may have to cross the sidewalk, pull up on the lawn mower handle to let the lawn mower shoot out the grass clippings, then cross while the mower is still angles.
The solution is to mow in a box shape, completely avoiding any edges or high-angle mower rotations:
In this way, your lawn will be smooth and your sidewalk clean.